How To Find Balance
Balance! Have you ever found yourself struggling with feeling totally out of balance. Welcome to the story of my life. As a working mom, I have often felt out of balance. As a SAHM, I struggled with this, too. My clients struggle with this. And the more I talk about it, teenagers -older adults struggle with this. And when I asked google, "How to find balance?" there were 1 billion responses. Ummm, OK, I guess this is a big issue and I'm not the only one who struggles with it.
Here's what I know. Finding balance in our life is hard, but it is necessary. It's what brings peace in the midst of chaos. I think so often I have struggled with balance because somehow, I have falsely bought into the lie that balance comes only when I have figured everything out and I'm executing things perfectly.
For example, my relationships are all good if I've had quality time with my husband, my kids, my parents, siblings, family and friends. There is balance at work when I am being the best coach, my days are planned out and scheduled, and my team and clients feel completely supported and everything is humming along and all my work is done before my kids get home so that they can have my complete attention and I am 100% present. Balance in my personal life means that I have perfectly planned quiet time every day to fill my soul, time to relax and be restored before the kids get home, time for house work and making dinner, coffee with friends who make me laugh and are life giving to my soul. Balance in my health and wellness journey looks like I'm killing my workouts everyday and staying on point day in and day out with my nutrition, with only an occasional treat or detour to chips and salsa and cocktails. And of course balance at home means healthy meals perfectly planned, laundry never piling up, ( like never taking 2 hours to deal with a pile that's been sitting for days), and the house is always clean!
NOOOOOO! This is not balance. This is an unrealistic expectation that will only make you and me crazy. When we expect that balance comes only when we have everything figured out and are executing it perfectly, then we are completely missing the mark and adding unnecessary stress to our lives.
Balance is knowing that you are doing your best to love your family and your kids and your friends every day. You show up, you know about their life, you take time to ask your hubby about his day and then you listen, you plop down on your kids' beds and ask how things are going at school, and you out your phone down, look them in the eye, and tell them you love them. Balance at work means you know that the work is NEVER DONE, so you give your best and then you close your computer and be present with your family and play games and take walks and let the work wait until tomorrow. Balance in your personal life means some days things go as planned and many days they don't. It's being ok with your quiet time lasting 5 minutes instead of 40, not having an hour to chat with a friend so you talk for 5 minutes, and having pancakes for dinner because you don't have time for anything else. It's about making a meal plan and doing your best to follow it, but you NEVER diet because dieting isn't balance. It's sometimes having cauliflower rice and kale, and sometimes having a heaping scoop of chocolate chip cookie batter. It's taking that clean pile of laundry and dumping it in the hallway and having a family event where everyone digs through and finds their stuff so you don't have to fold it and put it away. It's looking around your house and being so thankful that you have a home instead of being irritated that there is stuff EVERYWHERE.
It's accepting that we aren't perfect and that we never will be. When we take a step back and look at all that we are managing, let's give ourselves grace and a high five because we know deep in our hearts we are doing the best we can. Balancing life, our schedule, our fitness, our nutrition, our home, our bills, our job, our relationships, and everything else can be so overwhelming. I totally get it! But, it's time to change our mindset and look at things a little differently!!
WE CAN"T DO IT ALL. So let's stop expecting that! This week, let’s commit together to simply doing what we can and letting the rest go.
Be present. Do the things that give life to our soul. And learn to be ok with being PERFECTLY IMPERFECT!!